Sayang Di Sayang

on Sunday, August 19, 2007

ANGIN MENDERU DAHAN JATUH
MENIMPA BATU KUBURAN
MURAI TERKEJUT BERKICAU-KICAUAN
LANGIT MENDUNG DILIPUTI AWAN
ALAMAT BUMI DISIRAMI HUJAN
SAYANG DI SAYANG

HATI KU RINDU ORANG JAUH
TAK LUPA DARI KENANGAN
FIKIRAN KUSUT BERISAU-RISAUAN
SAKIT UNTUK DITINGGALKAN ABANG
IBARAT KAPAL TIDAK BERHALUAN
SAYANG DI SAYANG

Tangga-Tangga Ke Pintu Bahagia

MANA SILAPNYA ARAH YANG AKU JEJAKI
YANG KU TEMU HANYA PINTU SEPI
DALAM KERIUHAN KU RASAKAN KEKOSONGAN
JIWAKU DAHAGA
KASIH SAYANG
MASIH TAK BERTEMU YANG KU CARI DULU
HATI MASIH BERLAGU
DALAM LANGKLAH PERJALANAN TERKELIRU
HILANGNYA ARAH TUJU

SUNGGUH LAMA TERPISAH PANDANGAN
SEJAK DETIK AKHIR PERTEMUAN
JAUH MENINGGALKAN
DIRIMU DAN DIRIKU
TERPISAH BERSAMA WAKTU

SEJAUH MANA SEKALIPUN AKU BERLARI
INGATAN PADAMU MENGHANTUI
AKU TAK MENGERTI DAN TIDAK KU MAMPU LAGI
MENAHAN GELORA HATI INI
INGIN KU KEMBALI KE JALAN YANG LURUS
AKU RINDU PADA MU
MOGA DIBUKAKAN SEMUA
PINTU-PINTU
UNTUK KU BERSAMAMU
INGIN AKU MENDAKI SEMULA
TANGGA - TANGGA KE PINTU BAHAGIA
MENCARI CAHAYA
CINTA YANG SEBENARNYA
ANTARA AKU DAN DIA.

fish head

on Thursday, August 16, 2007


i will tell you where is this fish head is from later.

What happen from Monday till Wednesday was at best I can say a tornado ride. The evaluation that was suppose to held in Sibu was cancelled at the last moment and transferred to Miri which is about 7 hours ride by bus. So it was a mad dash or me to get a bus to Miri considering that there is limited number of buses that actually goes there.

So begins my journey to another place that is unknown. I have never been to Miri and this will be my first time going there. It will also be my first time going north up north of Sarawak by bus too. My bus was scheduled to leave from the Sibu Bus Terminal at 3.30 pm. But as usual it was delayed and the bus only left at 4.30pm. I knew that this delay will be damaging because the ETA of the bus to reach Miri was 11.30pm and with the delay it has push the ETA to 12.30 if nothing happens along the way. Thank god nothing happen along the way except for 2 or 3 times the bus encountered with really slow moving vehicles that I suspect that are not road worthy or the driver doesn’t have a license not to mention the overloaded lorries that are carrying logs from the logging area
that are abundant in Sarawak.

The bus that I was riding was full of Indonesian that I think were from Tebedu and were heading for Bintulu and Miri. I suspected them to be working in the various factories and sawmills in the Bintulu and Miri area. Most of the time in the bus, was looking at the scenery as the bus speed along. There was nothing interesting that caught my eyes. Just the normal Sarawak landscape. Small towns and longhouses doted the route to Bintulu. The bus stopped at a small service area. I was hungry but I didn’t buy anything there for I was skeptical of the hygiene. Dogs were running here and there between the various stalls. I then say and Iban women selling “mata kucing”. It is a local fruit the size of marbles with brown skin and white flesh with a maroon-ish seed. It is quite sweet and tasty. It is easy eat. One just have to squeeze the fruit until the skin breaks and then just bite into the white flesh. Perfect for eating in the bus.

The bus continued on after 30 minutes of break. The sun has set and I cannot see anything out side the bus so I looked up to the skies and watch the sky turn from crimson red to orange then to the black of night. I had my mp3 player with me and I was listening to a selection of songs ranging from bands like Therion to some keroncong songs.

I fell asleep somewhere around Stapang and woke up when the bus brake suddenly. It was near the Tatau bridge. From Tatau to Bintulu the bus stopped several times to drop of the Indonesian that wanted to get off. I was right when I suspected them to be working in sawmills because I can see various sawmills and worker’s hostel near the road. The continues it’s journey with me in it as a helpless passenger being toss about as the road conditions gets worse. Uneven resurfacing, potholes, the odd bumps and undulation all help make my back feels like I’m 70 years old.

The bus eventually reaches Medan Jaya in Bintulu where I had a chance to get some bread and water from a supermarket. It was around 8.15 pm. The bus left the station at 8.30pm and the journey continues to Miri. Again I fell asleep and when I woke up, I saw the bus was pulling into what I thought that I have reached Miri but it was actually another service area near Batu Niah. I finally had the chance to get something to eat for this service area is much more cleaner. I ordered “mee goreng basah” and to my surprise when it arrive the mee goreng basah actually had soup all over it. It was different then the one that I used to have in my home town or in Sibu. After 30 minutes of break we continued on with the journey. It was 10.30 pm

Feeling sleepy from my dinner I fell asleep again. I woke up when the bus reach the Miri bus terminal at 12.30am. I was pick up by a friend. I was so tired that I fell asleep as soon my head touches the pillow. I will continue what happen in the morning soon.

Betrayed.......................

on Saturday, August 11, 2007

I was betrayed. I was betrayed by the people that should have been my link to the system. Yet what they did today cannot be dismissed easily. If there is any party that is trying to cover up something by denying my rights today, this is a warning to them. Blood will flow and heads will roll.

From my previous post I should be at home by now with my family but that isn’t the reality. That scene only exist now in my dream for my flight was cancelled by some top brass in the HQ deeming that I was not worthy to use the charted air ticket. The news arrive to me just minutes before I was to check in for the flight. Not only I was denied my flight, I was also removed from the evaluation that I should be taking on the 14th.

I managed to contain the damage by getting the evaluation to be done at a location near my work place yet the flame of anger burns strong in me. As I look hard into myself to find peace with the predicament that I went through today I realize the anger actually came from the fact that I can’t be with my family and not from being removed from the evaluation.

Being away from the family is taking a toll on my emotions. It has been almost 7 month since I last say them and it will be another 2 month before I can go back for the holidays. That to is just for about roughly 14 days depending either if HQ will approve my leave. If not I have to go back for about a week only.

I don’t have the mood to publish today so I will end here for today. Happy days everyone and god bless us all.

on Wednesday, August 8, 2007

A pleasant surprise waited for me this morning at the office. It was a fax from headquarters that required me to report there on the 14th of August for a competency test. I don’t mind taking the test as it is a good indicator whether I’m getting rusty or I’m improving. The surprise is that in my homesick situation I am able to go back for free because the airfare will be taken care of.

Nobody at home knows yet because I want to surprise them. I said to them that I will be coming back during the Hari Raya holidays. My mother and grandmother will be so surprise when they see me appear suddenly at the front door.

Some have asked me why don’t I go back more often when I have the chance to. Not that I can’t afford the airfare or the time but to tell the truth I can’t stand goodbyes. It breaks my heart time and time again whenever I have to leave them and return back here to Sibu. People say it is a normal thing to meet and say goodbye. I acknowledge the thought. Month and month I am in Sibu and I have like 2 weeks of holiday before I have to return for another year. The pain of separation is deeply felt in me but I don’t show it to anyone. That is why I don’t let anyone to send me off at the airport for I rather take the time to commute to slowly prepare myself for the flight back to Sibu.

Some asked me why don’t I asked for a transfer so that I can be back home. The answer to that is that the life is quite good here as long I don’t venture off to town. The meals are served, lodging is provided, uniforms are given and the pay is adequate. Another thing that is holding me down is that getting transferred is difficult especially when I only want to be transferred to the HQ for that is where I can developed to my full potential. This place is more like a training ground for me to prepare for the transfer to the HQ when the time has come.

Other asked me how does my girlfriend stands up with the fact that I’m so far away and we seldom meet and when we do meet it is just for a short period of time. People say that long distance relations are risky for one of the partner not be able to stand the emotional stress that is commonly related to long distance relationship. I agree but there are some good in long distance relationship. First is that you don’t get bored with each other. Some couple tends to be bored with each other after awhile especially when they are in a relationship for more then 2 years. This gives a chance for the boredom to dissipate. Secondly you don’t run out of ideas of places to go considering that neither of you will spent considerable time at certain places that are special for you like the place that you both meet for the first time or first date, where you celebrated your birthday together and other places that are special to you yet are ordinary to others. Thirdly you will value your partner even more when you are away for such a long time and distance.

There are some bad things that can happen in a long distance-long term relationship and most of it involving 1 party getting heart broken or both of them. The only way to counter the negative effect of long distance-long term relationship is to be true to yourself and your partner. Don’t leave your partner in the dark of your status. Write a letter, send a postcard or in this modern days send and email, sms or call your partner. Don’t leave them hanging on to the false hope of you calling or contacting them. When it gets to prolonged the effects are devastating. For the girls and some boys you must not be blinded by jealousy especially the blind type. If your partner doesn’t call or contact you doesn’t mean that they are flirting. It may just be that they are busy or fallen ill. Couples in long distance-long term relationship also has to fight off the emotional temptation of others that may approach in the form of colleague that show empathy towards your loneliness. They maybe just good friends who just want to cheer you up but you are thinking the are the one for you for they are providing you with the attention that you are craving for. Just stay true to yourself and trust each other and everything will be just fine. In the case that the other partner is not faithful, just dump the fellow and get 1 that is.

I’m putting some photos of where I’m working most of it is the water recreation area. Until next time I hope all of you will have happy days ahead of you and god bless us all.



The little speck that is on the swing is me.

circle????

on Tuesday, August 7, 2007

     It is really funny how the world seems to work. At 1 moment you are the king of the hill and the next thing you know you’re a nobody. Life is like that. It is an never ending cycle of ups and down on our life till our very last breath. I was thinking about this for awhile now. Today I seem to reflect on myself more then I usually do. I look around me and I just amazed myself on how great is this life. Who ever thought that from my humble house in the small village in Selangor, I ended up to where I am now. In Sibu, Sarawak. That is roughly 1200km away from my village.

     I never dream even as a small kid to ever worked here. Maybe I had wanted to come here for a visit but never in my wildest dream that I would 1 day work here. I started out working as laborer in a casting factory not far from my house. If I really wanted to go back I was working part time on my school holidays selling fern shoots to sponsor my appetite for motoring. So as lonely and humble my life is at that time as a laborer then the factory decided to pack up and move to a new location. I didn’t follow the factory and so I was jobless for the time being.
 
     Luckily for me I found a job as a dishwasher at a restaurant which is also near to my home. The job was ok. Not to difficult and the pay was good. Rm15per day. I work for about 6 month and my application was approved at a local tertiary education center. Little did I know that for the next 2 years that I will be there will the start of a new phase of my life and most of the lessons that I learn in the 2 years kept me going until today.

     I’m not going to tell all the things that I learn or experience in my 2 years for it will take a lot of space. Suffic eto say that I learn a lot. I meet a lot of people. I made a lot of friends some are even with me till this day.

     My life took another turn when my father was diagnose with cancer. All of the sudden I was the bread winner for the family. My mother had to take unpaid leave to be with my father at the hospital. She would take care of my father in the day while I took care of him at night. I got a job at a fast food joint. I work there for about 3 month then I got a job as a sales assistant in a very famous optical retail chain store. I work there for years and I enjoyed it. The pay was good then the unthinkable happen. The company downsized and I was not on the payroll anymore.

      I apply to work in another prominent company and got the job and that too wasn;t long for I was offered my current position about 3 month into the job. So here I am now writing my life. What I’m really trying to tell is that there is a cycle in our life.

     When we are at the top doesn’t mean that we will be always on top and when we are at the bottom doesn’t mean that we will always be at the bottom. When we are at the top we must remember to be prepared for we can fall down. We must also remember to be kind to the people that are bellow us for one day they might be at a position that is higher then us. When we are at the bottom we must not despair and blame the world for it’s cruelty on you. We human are a strange lot. We wail in despair, we blame others or ourselves for anything that is bad that happen to us but in the end we still managed to get over it one way or the other. So with that I put up something that will be like a logo for me a circle. To symbolize the ever constant revolving world of ours.

monday..... what can i say it is a monday

on Monday, August 6, 2007

     Nothing much is going on. It is just a typical monday. All of my schedule for this week has been  push back to a later date to due unforseen circumstances. It dosen't bother me much though for i have some important matters that i have to look into after KIVing them for sometime. The most important matter is i have to make decision that will take effect on someone in the workplace getting the boot. It is not that i enjoyed sacking people ut i have no choice when sufficient warnings and that person still plays a hard head then i will have no choice but to make a decision to support the sacking of that person.

    Not to say that he is a bad egg or anything but i think it is more to arrogance. the said person is a long time staff. He has been with the establishment for about a year now but from what i can see is that the said person have change from a shy, and most of the time obedient staff to a truant, snob. I dont really like sacking people but i have to take actions to people who are a threat to the integrity of the workplace. 
Just 2 weeks ago another 1 got sack for his act of racism. sorry for the wonky paragraph. i just cant get the text editor to be on myside as i'm wiriting this down

      

     I dont really understand the people in this state. The can't bear to see people of other race or state who are better then them. the will try by hook or by crook to make the other race look like a second class to them yet they fail to see that it is their own race that are weak and incompetent.

     That is the only feasible explanation that i have regarding why there so many of us from the 
peninsular are serving in this state as school teachers, police officers, army personels, 
admin clerks, and other various position in the state goverment because the cant take care of 
their own bloody state for themselve.

     When the people of this state are offered jobs that are currently being filled by people from the peninsular they are reluctant to be send of to the deeper areas of the state they are reluctant to go and are willing to let go of the post because they are not willing to go out of their comfort zone.

     My laptop battery is running out of juice.so i will end it here for now. have a good day

     

hmmm it is a sunday

on Sunday, August 5, 2007

     It is a beautiful sunday. The sun is shining, the sky is blue, the birds are flying about yup today is a beautiful day. I'm just trying to relax after a chaotic week. Hopefuly next week is not as bad as this week.

     This what my schedule will look starting 06/08/07

06/08/07 - 0600 am : Fishing competition between the stafs

06/08/07 - 1930 pm : Continuation of the bowling competition we had about a month ago.
                                         This time it is to get our all star team ready for the friendly matches that                                          will be setup in te near future. I'm still having trouble to break the 350                                          points mark. 

07/08/07 - nothing yet in my daily planner so maybe it is a rest day

08/08/07 - our first friendly bowling match. The opponent is a strong one. 
                      I really hope that our team will win. The time is not yet set but i think it will be in
                     the evening.
                     

For the rest of the week i can't see any  plans or projects yet. I will just lounge in my room as i wait for something interesting to happen until then. Please enjoy this video from Rammstein till we meet again. It is very entertaining to say the least.









what did i say. interesting eh.

rubella outbreak!!! what is a rubella anyway.

on Friday, August 3, 2007

There has been a Rubella outbreak at the place where i'm currently working. The good news is that everyone has been vacinated by the health department. The bad news is that all of us are under quarantine for 10 days starting 02/08/07.

Some of you may not have heard of Rubella or know what it is. This is what i dug up from wikipedia about the Rubella virus.

Rubella, commonly known as German measles, is a disease caused by the rubella virus. It is often mild and an attack can pass unnoticed. However, this can make the virus difficult to diagnose. The virus usually enters the body through the nose or throat. The disease can last 1-5 days. Children recover more quickly than adults. Like most viruses living along the respiratory tract, it is passed from person to person by tiny droplets in the air that are breathed out. Rubella can pose a serious risk as it can also be transmitted from a mother to her developing baby through the bloodstream via the placenta. If the mother is infected within the first 20 weeks of pregnancy, the child may be born with congenital rubella syndrome, which includes a range of birth defects. The virus has an incubation period of 2 to 3 weeks during which it becomes established.

What comes to my surprise is, for as of my knowledge Rubella in Malaysia is simply an ancient disease for there was vaccination program done to school children from the 1980's till the late 90's. How did it ever became an outbreak in Sarawak is just mind boggling. FYI i'm working in Sarawak, Malaysia in a town called Sibu.

Another thing that caught me by surprise is that a statement from a high ranking official in the health ministry when they came for the vacination program is that there are other outbreak as well but it was not publish in the news for orders from a politician that said news of the outbreak should be keep mum for fearing of revenues generated by the tourisim industry will be effected thus reducing the cash that are flowing to the state goverment coffers. I have been working in Sibu for about 2 years and from what i can gather, this state in Malaysia is full of corrupted politics. From the lowest of jobs till the higher ups of the state government.

When the price of sugar was fixed by the federal goverment due to a sugar shortage the nation was suffering traders in Sibu simply hoard the sugar supply and sell them to certain parties only and when the do sell it to the public it was price riddiculusly. There was no action from the relevant authorities for their mouth was shut by the gangs that control Sibu.

Another item that caught my attention was Malaysians from the Peninsular are required to have working permits in order to work in Sarawak. This is just too absurd. People from Peninsular Malaysia who are recognised as Malaysian have to apply for permits just to work in a state that is inside Malaysia. I pity the soldiers from the Peninsular that gambled with live to free this state from insurgents i the 1960's till 1990 that are now retired and fancy to spend the rest of their lives in Sarawak but are required to have a work permit just to stay in this state that they risk to free.

Sarawak is a beautiful state but the people who run it are ugly, filthy pigs that should be hang and displayed to others as a warning to others so as to take the responsibility that the people have given by choosing them as their leader. The people make a leader, the people can break a leader.

I'm of to bed. My fever is getting higher. Just hope that something good is coming my way.